Random Thoughts

I hate the smell of hospitals...always have, but now I love them, they are the only smells I have to assosiate with my baby girl.

I can now tell when others are in mental anguish.

I am starting to get to know my way around this huge hospital, like the smell, I hate being here-but love it, because it means I can see my girl.

I have talked about death before. And I was assuming that it would be one of my Grand-Parents that went first, since after all that is the way that it goes, right...
Never thought that my own daughter could be the first one in my life that left...
Freaking hurts.

My Life is Upside-Down

My second daughter was born this past Friday. She was a month early. She now lives in the ICU of the nearest hospital. I am drained, spent, exausted and frightened. I will try to update when I can about her status. Her big sister, my 2 1/2 year old can't see her because she isn't allowed in the ICU. She is worried about her baby sister. She colors her pictures and wants me to discribe the baby to her. I was in the middle of it last night, when I started crying. That totally unglued my 2 year old. I guess when you are the guy in the family, with three other ladies, you have to be the strong one.
I didn't know that I could love a little person so much. I only saw the baby for about 5 seconds when we realized that something was wrong...and I felt that my heart was already being ripped out of my body. I don't even know this little person...and I miss having her home with me, with us, as a part of the family...
I came home from the hospital, and gave my 2 year old... the "big-sister" a huge hug.
You can e-mail me and I can give you more details...right now Iam pretty shook up and I am going to go now...
Grab every moment that you can...they don't last forever.

I am learning Portuguese...

It is sweet. Spanish speaking people say that it sounds like Spanish with your fingers in your mouth. Portuguese speaking people get offended when you say that. There are similarities, after all on both sides of the ocean the countries that speak Portuguese are neighbors with the Spanish speakers.
We are only learning it for 6 weeks. We are in our fourth week, and we already can recognize over 200 words. The point of us doing this for only 6 weeks is for us to learn how to use the techniques that we have been learning in class. I have to say that they are pretty effective. I can't read it, but I can write words out phonetically, and read them back to my language helper and he can understand me. It is a cool feeling to be able to communicate in another language. As the typical American I only know two languages, English and Bad English, so this is a fun experience for me!
Ok, got to get back to class...in body at least...

Ok, I Lied...

I haven't been on-line at all since my last post. So I just re-read it, and I have come to the conclusion that it should be ignored. I blame it on my daughter. She was sick and kept me up to 5:15 AM. I am so not joking. I love my daughter with all my heart, but when you have to get up and go to work at 7:30 and the clock keeps getting closer to that time and you still haven't slept...you want to scream.
But she is better, and I am better, so everything is better...and men still rule.
To prove that they do I have found another fabulous list to post about the differences between men and women. Honestly read these and tell me why it isn't better to be a man!

1. NAMES:
If Laurie, Linda, Elizabeth and Barbara go out for lunch, they will
call each other Laurie, Linda, Elizabeth and Barbara.
If Mark, Chris, Eric and Tom go out, they will affectionately refer
to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla, Peanut-Head and Scrappy.

2. EATING OUT:
When the bill arrives, Mark, Chris, Eric and Tom will each throw ina $20, even though it's only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want the change back.
When the women get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.

3. MONEY:
A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs
A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need but it's on sale.

4. BATHROOMS:
A man has five items in his bathroom: a toothbrush, shaving cream,
razor, a bar of soap, and a towel from the Marriott.
The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337.
A man would not be able to identify most of these items.

5. ARGUMENTS:
A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

6. CATS:
Women love cats.
Men say they love cats, but when women aren't looking, men kick cats.

7. FUTURE:
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

8. SUCCESS:
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

9. MARRIAGE:
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change and she does.

10. DRESSING UP:
A woman will dress up to go 4 shopping, to water the plants,
empty the garbage, answer the phone, read a book, and read the mail.
A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.

11. NATURAL:
Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.
Women somehow deteriorate during the night.

12. OFFSPRING:
Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about
dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods,
secret fears and hopes and dreams.
A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.

13. FINAL THOUGHT:
Any married man should forget his mistakes.
There's no use in two people remembering the same thing.

Women Win This Round...

I have come to the conclusion, that even though men think that they are in control, they aren't...women really are. I has taken me awhile to recognize this fact, and even longer to admit it. But there it is.
Women will get their way, regardless of what we as guys think. We can put up a fight for as long as we want, but in the end we will give in.
I am a pretty stubborn person...or so I have been told...but I am no match for women, regardless of their age. I can do anything, I can scream, I can even change the subject, and before I know it, I am doing what I said I didn't want to. The persistence that I have seen in some women, when they want something...DANG. There is the standing joke when you are in a relationship, that if you are "in trouble" the guy sleeps on the couch. When I was a kid I used to think that was a bunch of bunk. I would say such things as, "I will sleep where I want to, she can move if she doesn't want to sleep with me." I now realize that the whole "sleeping on the couch" thing is not a punishment, is more of a defensive position. Sometimes that is the only way that a guy is going to get ANY sleep at all!
It wasn't always this way. In my younger days, I would stick with my decision, just to prove a point, but now...I pick my battles. If it is something that I am really adament about, then I can stick to my guns...I'm not a wimp, but as I get older I realize that so many issues are just so petty.
Am I getting wiser, or am I just tired?

Mixing Passions...

I love to read, and I love quotes. If you have been reading my blog for any lenght of time, this would not be news to you. I've talked about this stuff before, and there is a good chance it will come up again. So the only thing greater then reading or finding cool quotes it finding a cool quote, while reading. Best of both worlds.
I have read a wide varity of types of books. From Tom Clancy, to Harry Potter, to Dean Koonts to lots in-between. (except romance...I hate those with a passion)
I have been reading the Dune series. If you have never read them, they are pretty indepth. I read one, then take a break and read something lighter, like all-six-harrypotters-in-a-row. That was a little extreme. I usually don't do that...
But anyway, in my readings I come across quotable material. Sometimes, if I remember I try to jot it down, but usually I forget and that is that. But I found these two quotes in Children Of Dune, and I couldn't pass them up.

The Univers is God's. It is one thing, a wholeness against which all separations may be identified. Transient life, even that self-aware and reasoning life which we call sentient, holds only fragile trusteeship on any portion of the wholeness.

Atrocity is recognized as such by victim and perpetrator alike, by all who learn about it at whatever remove. Atrocity has no excuses, no mitigating argument. Atrocity never balances or rectifies the past. Atrocity merely arms the future for more atrocity. It is self-perpetuating upon itself--a barbarous form of incest. Whoever commmits atrocity also commits those future atrocities thus bred.

Pretty deep huh?
Dang, and you all thought that I was just some shallow shmuck!

Helpful Tips For Managers...

I found this list on-line the other day. I have never really had a manager as bad as this, but I have heard of a few. So far I have been fortunate in work.


Never give me work in the morning.
Always wait until 4:00pm and then bring it to me.
The challenge of a deadline is refreshing.

If it's really a "rush job", run in and interrupt me every 10 minutes to inquire how it's going.
That helps. Or even better, hover behind me, advising me at every keystroke.

Always leave without telling anyone where you're going.
It gives me a chance to be creative when someone asks where you are.

Wait until my yearly review and THEN tell me what my goals SHOULD have been.
Give me a mediocre performance rating with a cost of living increase.
I'm not here for the money anyway.

If you give me more than one job to do, don't tell me which is the priority.
I like being a psychic.

Do your best to keep me late.
I adore this office and really have nowhere to go or anything to do.
I have no life beyond work.

If a job I do pleases you, keep it a secret. If that gets out, it could mean a promotion.
If you don't like my work, tell everyone. I like my name to be popular in conversations. I was born to be whipped.

If you have special instructions for a job, don't write them down. In fact, save them until the job is almost done. No use confusing me with useful information.

Never introduce me to the people you're with.
I have no right to know anything. In the corporate food chain, I am plankton.
When you refer to them later, my shrewd deductions will identify them.

Tell me all your little problems. No one else has any and it's nice to know someone is less fortunate.
I especially like the story about having to pay so much taxes on the bonus check you received for being such a good manager.

Yes, I Rock...

I got a little creative this year with my carving. I am tired of the usual, everyday Jack'o Lanterns... So this year I did it a bit different! I even won the "Most Unusual" award for it. I have a feeling that they made that category up just for me.
That's ok, I'll take it!