The Things I Do For Free Stuff

I am a sucker for free things.
"You will give me a free T-shirt if I do that? Sweet...Sign me up."
This latest thing though was the craziest thing I have done in along time for something free.
I was told by my loving wife, that there was a place that you could renew your vows for Valentines Day. I was against it from the first, but then she said that you get a free dinner for two and two movie tickets. So my little ears perked up. But what is the catch? The place that you renew your vows was in a Walmart parking lot.
ARE YOU KIDDING??? How very redneck can one get?
So I came up with the excuse that there was no way I could even remember what I said on my wedding day in order to try to say them as a Walmart. My wife saw that I was less then enthuseastic and dropped the whole idea.
On Feb.13 I overheard some guys that I work with talking about how they were going to go to this Vow Renewal Ceremony. They had gone the year before and really had a good time. They said that they thought that it was going to be "hokey" but it acutually was pretty nice.
So I surprised my wife and told here that I thought we should go and try it out...worst case scenario...we get a free meal and a movie.
We went out for a Valentine lunch, (dodge the crowds that way) and got to Walmart at 3:20. We were second in line and since the whole thing kicked off at 4 we just talked and visited in the car. At 4 we find out that the Pastor had just been woken up from his nap and was about 20 minutes out.
Nice.
Then at 4:20 we get called into the tent to begin. They call about 15 couples in at once and a big biker women gets up on the stage with a Bible.
I am beginning to wonder if this was such a good idea after all.
Apparently the pastor hadn't made it yet, and they couldn't wait any longer for him.
So this women begins with a prayer saying that would God please bless these couples that had come to renew their vows.
I am beginning to think that I am not here for the same reason that some of these people are. Some people are dressed up, they are looking deeply into their spouses eyes, and I am here for the free stuff.
It goes down hill when I am told to, "Look into my brides eyes and tell her that she is the 'apple of my eye' and that she 'makes my heart go pitter patter'."
Really...I don't recall saying that at my wedding...or anytime in my life for that matter...
We end with another prayer that God would, "re-light the spark in our marriage after tonight".
I am just praying that there are some free goodies after all this.
We end and I look around to see how many people beside my wife and me think this is the silliest thing we have ever done. I then notice that I am a minority in my view. People are really into this...there are actually people, men and women with tears in their eyes.
I was in shock. I thought it it was a funsillyjokething, and there were people there that were quite seriously renewing their vows IN A WALMART PARKING LOT!!!
Oh my word...
But there was free stuff...dinner and a movie...so I am happy. It at least gave me something blog-worthy!!!